It’s been a while since you’ve had an overload of my randomness. I figured you were all getting antsy 🙂
-I thought I would be super excited to have all my laundry caught up today. Turns out, its better that I never have it caught up. All this time that a full hamper stared me down making me feel less than human because my mom NEVER let laundry get behind with a full household…..and I’m just doing laundry for one……WELL NO MORE…..only because today I realized that when all my laundry is caught up and nothing is in the hamper……that I don’t have enough drawers or closet space for it all. Therefore, in the future clothes must fill the hamper so other clothes can breathe in their tightly filled spaces.
-I’ve decided that really I’m not any crazier than the rest of you weirdoes out there. I’m just way more comfortable in my crazy than you are in yours. Don’t hate. Embrace.
-I will never for the life of me understand how someone can be your “friend” or acquaintance and be nice as pie, supportive, uplifting, bla bla bla only to go directly for the fat comments when they are mad. Things such as “well, she’s too fat anyway” are not even remotely intelligent arguments against anyone. You immediately fall so far off the ladder of existence to me that not even bringing me chunky monkey ice cream and all the seasons of 24 will fix it. It’s just rude. You didn’t think I was all that fat or that it was a problem when you were friends with me. Now that you disagree with me, it’s the sole problem of everything about me. L A M E
-Every single time the Dance Central commercial comes on, it makes me want to go out and buy the xbox 360 kinect set up and get down. I think my chances of becoming a professional dancer have passed but that doesn’t mean that I can’t be one in the comfort of my own home.
-As I’m sitting here typing this note, I honestly believe that my body is going to burn from the inside out. That’s what a hot flash feels like folks. This weather doesn’t help either. I have contemplated at least twice in the last three minutes about going outside and sleeping on the sidewalk. I think I should invent a whole blanket of ice. Like ice packs on steroids. You should be able to freeze it and when a hot flash hits, you just lay under the blanket of ice. If you would’ve told me a year ago that this is what life would be like without a uterus, I would have told you that my special ed uterus was just fine where it was, have a nice day. Instead, I didn’t know that so now, for the rest of my life of using technology, you will be subjected to frequent updates in regards to hot flashes.
-I have decided that the perfect man for me is the kind with Liam Neeson like tendencies from the movies Taken and Unknown. There is just something about his take charge, intelligent, distinguished looking self that gets me. Plus, I figure we all know it’s gonna take one heck of a man to put up with me and know when and how to tell me to shut up….so he might as well have all those characteristics Liam plays to be able to follow through.
-Valentine’s day was this month? I didn’t notice. BLAH!!! What the world should really come around to marketing is AliciaPalooza. Just my opinion.
-When God tells you to step out of your comfort zone, do it, and wear a pair of fabulous shoes. I read this recently on a calendar I have at my desk and have decided that in the event I’m being called out of my comfort zone, my shoes will be glittered!
-Do you know what I love about waking up every day (other than it confirms that I’m not dead)…..that it’s the chance to start over and do something greater than the day before. Boy do I need to be taking advantage of that more.
-On a recent trip back home I went to church with my mom. It’s a country church. The old school kind where everything echoes, the pews are uncomfortable and they still sing from hymnals. But it’s just the kind of place everyone should visit. It’s humbling. But more than anything, I’m convinced that is where the most genuine people in the world gather. To watch those people interact with each other (even if you took the church out of it….) is the true form of genuineness and kindness. And just as that’s true…..so is country love. Period. It’s the best kind. More people should spend more time with couples from that realm of life. It’s real, it’s lasting and it’s what I’m holding out for no matter how long it takes it to show up!
-Next Sunday marks the 2 year (730 days) anniversary of my dad dying. I cannot believe it’s been two years. That alone and the journey from there to here is a blog (or book) within itself. I’ve struggled in preparation for it. Those who say it gets easier or that it passes must have a lot more strength than me. Because the thought of that day cuts me in my gut. Sure, it is easier in most ways, but I think in year two you carry a worry that everyone will start forgetting about him, how awesome he was etc. Truth is, none of that matters. I wanted to do something that day that would make me feel closer to him, or that he and I are spending the day together (as weird as that may sound)…..so I’ve decided to take an all day fishing trip. I’m going to get up and make it through the day with a very dear friend. He promises that we will just sit and fish……and I can be what I need to be. I’m looking forward to it but could sure use a cup or two of strength this week. The whole week plays over and over in my head…..from the time we turned him off…..to the time I came back to NWA against my better judgment b/c I was worried about being in trouble at work since he hadn’t died yet……to the very second I got the call that he was gone. I know it isn’t healthy to probably sit and think of that….and the time I spend thinking of it is dramatically less than two years ago. But it still lingers….and instead of fighting it, I’ve just decided to let it be and linger however it needs to in hopes that eventually it will pass. So that’s my disclaimer of crankiness this week. If I’m withdrawn, or uninterested or a thousand other things….that’s probably why.