I probably should’ve started the series with this since that’s one of the first fields you have to pick in creating an online dating profile. But….I honestly didn’t think about it until I saw today’s “who wants to meet you list” in my own dating notifications. There it was, “muffdivindaddy69″……..once I saw it, I knew I had to address it.
While I think that the “nickname” portion of the profile can be one of the most fun yet challenging parts of creating your online dating presence, I also think that not enough thought and attention has been given to it. OR, people in general are reverting to some puberty induced teenage brain activity that makes them think presenting themselves as “muffdivindaddy69” will “bring all the ladies” to his house. The name you pick is equally as important as the pic you choose. These two things are usually what pop up in search results so you want to be sure you are soliciting the right attention.
Below are my opinionated tips on things to watch out for in choosing an online dating “name”
1. Don’t be so cryptic that nobody is going to get what you are talking about. So, you have this inside joke with your friends that includes some weirdo nickname they gave you. That’s great! I love nicknames too! However, if no one outside your circle of friends is going to know what you’re talking about, don’t use it in your name. The argument could be made that it would spark conversation and you could explain yourself in that conversation. However, you risk the chance of being looked over completely. It’s like when you’re behind a car with a custom license plate. A bunch of letters together that are supposed to say something clever……..so you follow the person past your exit cause you just need that extra time to figure out what the heck they are trying to say on their plate. Wait…I’m the only one who does that? Oh, ok.
2. Don’t be dirty. Just stop. It’s not cute. And you are supposed to be an adult. Even if a girl is surfing the profiles looking for a good time with a masked gunman, it is highly likely that your immature attempt at naming yourself something that involves “69” is going to get her excited to look at your profile. It’s just tacky, immature, and a host of other things.
3. Avoid the words “prince”, “romance”, or proper names of products such as “Chevy”, “Ford”, etc. Using the words “prince” and such make it look like you’re trying too hard. Every guy on the internet wants me to think he could be my prince charming. And I would venture to say that most women are way over that theory these days. We know Disney movies lied to us about the fairy tale. We are still trying to recover. Using proper product names could lead us to assume you are so caught up in that product that you would be willing to name a child after it. Which also ties into my previous advice not to include pictures of your truck in your profile. We admire your loyalty to a brand/product and your passion for it, but we don’t want to compete with it from the get go.
4. Be catchy and use this as an opportunity to let me know something about you. For instance, my name is “dame-against-lames”. Although it could be perceived as a thousand different things I’m sure, I chose it to indicate “look, I’m so over lame-o’s on this site so just know from the second you pull up this profile, I’m against lame interaction”. It should send the message that you are probably going to have to be “quick on your feet” to catch my attention and get me to respond. It also probably tells you that I have been online dating enough to have met a lot of guys………and that’s ok too I guess.
Ultimately, it’s your name. Call yourself whatever you want. But be prepared to explain it in some cases. And in some of those cases, your explanation might not be enough to save you.
Alicia Out Loud 